Welcome to Syfy Schlock!, a recurring column devoted to those infamous movies hailing from “The Most Dangerous Night on Television”. Indeed, I’m reliving Syfy née the Sci Fi Channel’s bygone weekend programming, which included some of the most dubiously made creature-features, supernatural slashers, and disaster movies to ever grace the small screen. And if you have even an iota of nostalgia for that now-obsolete age of reckless, low-tier entertainment as I do, then you’ve come to the right place.
With all the many monsters and myths taking up space in Syfy Originals, there seemed to be little room left over for ghosts. Indeed, these movies had a tendency to gloss over that one major staple of the horror genre, however, some spirits managed to slip in and under the radar. The two flicks in this double-feature absolutely boast phantoms — they’re overflowing with them, in fact — however, their hauntings go beyond creaky old houses.
After being underwhelmed by Monsterwolf, my opinion of director Todor Chapkanov could only go up with 2009’s Ghost Town, right? At the very least, the premise was more promising, not to mention threatening, than a magical wolf running amok in Louisiana. This Ghost Town, which isn’t a remake of or really anything like the 1988 Empire Pictures movie of the same name, is rather straightforward, despite its aim to be anything but.
On a fateful Friday the 13th, college students are picked off in an abandoned Old West town. Their bus is broken, the adult supervision is dead, and a killer curse has been triggered. Naturally, the only way out is lifting that curse; otherwise, the characters will all become permanent residents in this haunted town. And making their task more challenging are the phantasmal cowboys and outlaws who, in their lifetime, once roamed these parts.
While not required for these Syfy outings, more often than not there is a scientific element in the story. And without a handy expert or researcher around to explain everything, Ghost Town settles on a collegiate debate team. Randy Wayne plays the smartest of the bunch, Carl, and Jessica Rose’s Chloe is knowledgeable in wicca. That last bit of expertise proves especially convenient once the curse needs deciphering, although the Bible and Fibonacci sequences are also put to use. For sure, there are the usual halfwits in the group, whose only purpose here is to be horny and die, but at the same time, the youths are largely written to be capable. The adults, on the other hand, are intentionally mindless to make their juniors seem more competent.
Ghost Town is working with just the one location, apart from a slyly Bulgarian backdrop; it’s partly shot at a famous film set and theme park in Arizona called Old Tucson. The venue looks way better groomed than it should be, but that can be forgiven. It’s like when period films have impossibly clean and preserved cars that were borrowed from vintage collectors. Nevertheless, Chapkanov took advantage of his pre-made set and delivered a basic cable movie with more flair than usual. We have actual atmosphere here, due in large part to the purposeful shadow and light work. From striking matches in the dark to mild emulations of Spielbergian lighting, Chapkanov put noticeable care in the presentation. That extra energy goes a long way with something as ultimately generic as Ghost Town.
The following year, Chapkanov chucked up the undemanding Monsterwolf, but here he turned in a watchable slasher western that benefits from both its well-crafted setting and ghoulish villains (including the late Billy Drago). Nothing jumps out as particularly memorable in the long run, however, if you’ve watched your fair share of Syfy’s monster offerings, Ghost Town is a decent break from routine.
I was expecting to enjoy Paul Ziller’s Ghost Storm more than Ghost Town, but I was wrong. This is another Syfy Original I initially believed I missed out on, back when it originally aired, and after finally watching, I’m not quite convinced this really was my first time witnessing folks get obliterated by atmospheric wraiths. I probably did catch it in 2012, then forgot. If you’ve seen Ghost Storm, you’d understand why I’m struggling to remember.
What immediately drew me in about Ghost Storm is its elevator pitch; a coastal community is hit by a wave of bizarre deaths caused by the unearthed spirits of mass-suicide victims. The characters realize there’s more to that story later on, but in the meantime, you get to watch the carnage unfold in hilarious fashion. Restless revenants awaken from the tragedy’s memorial, enter the air, then strike down everyone in godlike fashion. It’s divine smiting with a supernatural twist.
As it turned out, Ghost Storm was unable to sustain itself once the otherworldly retribution commenced. In between the plotting is, of course, a buffet of death; a few sequences were agonizing and surprisingly detailed in their execution, complete with desiccated corpses and obvious but spiffy CGI. Whereas most other fatality scenes were achieved with hasty and laughable depictions of atomized fodder.
The characters themselves are as perfunctory as the kills. Leads Carlos Bernard and Crystal Allen are the exes whose inevitable reunion can be seen a mile away, and with their teenage sleuth of a daughter (Cindy Busby), they all work together to save the town. Aiding them is a paranormal expert played by Aaron Douglas, the Vincent D’Onofrio of Canadian television. He could have been the shot of personality needed to make Ghost Storm’s interpersonal drama a tad less formulaic, but sad to say, Douglas’ role is equally superficial. Maybe more so.
In the end, Ghost Storm can be summed up as an extended and somewhat grislier episode of Haven with generous dashes of The Fog thrown in for flavor. If only it had the charm of said Syfy show or any of the same network’s quirky supernatural procedurals airing at the same time. It’s as if Ziller (Beyond Loch Ness, Snakehead Terror, Yeti: Curse of the Snow Demon) pared down the formats of Eureka and Warehouse 13, only to then leave us with a drab shell of a speculative story that’s dragged down by a humdrum cast.
Ghosts didn’t come up too often in Syfy Originals, and maybe that’s because, from a plot perspective, it’s harder to explain their origin than monsters or demons. Or, perhaps they just didn’t attract audiences. Considering how I hadn’t heard of, or remembered in the case of Ghost Storm, either of these movies until now, that seems to be the more plausible explanation for that sense of neglect.
Stay tuned for more Syfy.
Tales from the Paulside 
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